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  • The Bathroom Break

It’s Tough Being a Single Mother, It’s Tougher Raising the Antichrist

By Sheila Maples

I first began to consider adoption when I reached my thirties. I had a couple of boyfriends, but nothing long-term and I definitely couldn’t picture myself having a kid with any of them. In fact, I began to think that maybe I couldn’t see myself having a kid at all. That’s when I met my son.

His story was tragic to be sure. Randall was orphaned after his mother’s stomach burst open in a torrent of blood and her body dissolved into black sludge, she didn’t survive this unfortunately. After his body was recovered from the sulfur smelling ooze, he was immediately put up for adoption. I fell in love with him and those rosy cheeks immediately.

To be sure it’s not always easy raising the son of Lucifer. Bath time is always an adventure, especially when he turns to the water into blood (apologies to my plumber). Not to mention he’s a picky eater, only live goats for this growing boy. I’d say the biggest challenge though right now is getting him to make friends, especially because they all keep on ending up drowned in the bathtub (again, apologies to my plumber).

Would I do things differently if I could go back in time? Not on your life. Though, I would like it if he wasn’t the Antichrist, but that’s just a preference.

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